


PATTERNS OF PAIN.

by jjvalentine



Category: Apex Legends (Video Games)
Genre: Depictions of horror, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Gen, Other, depictions of violence, gender neutral reader, more to be added - Freeform, slowburn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-16
Updated: 2020-05-17
Packaged: 2021-02-28 05:08:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,395
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22748344
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jjvalentine/pseuds/jjvalentine
Summary: You're new to the Apex games, meaning that the NEW new guy isn't being noticed as much anymore. In fact, he's being all but ignored. But that doesn't bother you, nor does his intimidation.Apex Legends' Revenant/reader insert.
Relationships: Revenant (Apex Legends)/Reader
Comments: 9
Kudos: 160





	1. GHOST.

After experiencing the adrenaline, fear, and pure rush of your _first_ ever match, you didn’t sleep well the following night. Flashes of squadmates falling, calling out for help, and you running into a firefight to try to stop them from bleeding out. It was, needless to say, a mosh pit where _nightmares_ were made. It didn’t help that there was always that lingering sensation of being _watched,_ yet wherever you looked, you saw nobody, nothing, even paying you any mind.

But that’s always where all the trouble starts, right?

The following matches garnered you quite the fanbase. You saw comments online of people gushing over your tactics, your skills, and even your kit. Your abilities allowed you to gain the upperhand when all hope is supposedly lost, granting a win in the long-run. When you were scouted for the Apex games, you were quite surprised that they had _requested_ you join, that the pay would be handsome, and there would be boatloads of opportunity, among other things. You watched the games near religiously when they first started, but sometimes opted to just have them on for background noise as time progressed. They could be more than gruesome, and sometimes you _just_ weren’t in the mood for that.

Upon receiving the letter, you immediately accepted. You had to bid your home, friends, and family goodbye, though, which stung more than it should have. Your friends promised they’d brag all about you to anyone they could, and if you ever got to a point of fame where you had merch, they’d wear it. Your family promised the same.

Packing only the necessities, you set off when pickup came to retrieve you. They said it was going to be a long journey, so get rest while you could, because they were going to plop you down in a match upon your arrival, wasting absolutely no time. You didn’t need training, anyway, since you had some history in the military. You were one of the perfect candidates to unleash onto the arena, and while you were sick with nerves, you were ready, too.

Upon arrival to the base where everybody stayed, you were shown your own chambers and told to prepare, as well as introduce yourself to everyone whenever you were good to go. After the agent left, you were on your own, staring into an empty room with the bare necessities. Tossing your duffel bag to the foot of the bed, you went into the bathroom and splashed your face with cold water to wake yourself up and rub the sleep from your eyes. For a moment, you and your reflection stared at each other, but you heard bustle from the commons room and it snapped you out of your stupor. Leaving the bathroom, you pulled your bag up and onto your bed, opening it and pulling out all your gear from within.

You had a relatively simple getup, opting for practicality over aesthetics…. Though, you _did_ have a colour scheme, at least. You didn’t want to be boring, this being a game all about flair and showing off. You held up your protective helmet, the gold accents framing the shiny silver that almost acted like a mirror of the unbreakable lens, and smiled to yourself. It had been a long time since you last wore any of it, but you kept fit, so it would still be the same size and everything. 

You stripped off your civilian clothes, putting on snug combat pants and a black wife beater shirt. You slid the chest piece on first, locking it into place before moving on to knee, elbow, and shoulder pads. Your boots took a little longer, them being the most complicated part of your whole kit. One boot consisted of three pieces. The feet, the shins, and the calves. Everything clicked into place, and when you stood, you were a few inches taller. Donned in what was basically shining armor, you slid your gloves on and made sure they were locked in place. Finally, you turned toward the door, staring at it for a long moment, contemplating, second guessing… Before throwing all that shit out the window.

Pulling your helmet on to mask your face, just to accentuate the mystery, you left the bedroom. All conversation stopped, attention moving to the new oddity that was joining the ranks. The silence was loud, but a girl in blue and orange jumped up from her seat, rushing over to greet you happily.

“You must be Iota, oui? Oh, it is so good to finally meet you! We were all told of a newcomer, but nothing much outside of that! My name is Nataile, but my nickname is Wattson!” She took hold of your hand, nearly shaking it right out of the socket before another woman came along, pretty pink hair put up into two buns. It made her head look like a heart, honestly. 

“Ajay Che, pleased to meet ‘ya,” she said, slipping Wattson’s hand out of yours to give you a quick shake, as well. “Call me Lifeline. That over there is Crypto, he’s not a social type, don’t take it personal. The others can introduce themselves, right?” As if on cue, a few more people came up to check you out, trying to assess what kind of person you were. Even the one called Crypto turned his gaze briefly toward you before going back to what he was doing.

Gibralter seemed ecstatic to have another tank-like player in the game, pulling you into his side with one of his big arms as he let out a hearty laugh. Pathfinder seemed just as excited, already saying that you were his friend. Mirage started talking about himself, and didn’t really stop until Octane pulled you away to ask if your boots were prosthetics like his. He never got an answer before Bloodhound shooed him off, the tracker introduced themselves before saying that most of the others were the friendly type, but don’t push it on the few that are antisocial. Wraith was curt, but not rude, and Caustic had grumbled something about your mask cancelling out his toxic gas. Bangalore took hold of your wrist, you doing the same, as you gave a profound shake. Militants tended to do so, and she shared that she knew some of what you did in the past, that she was impressed it took them _this_ long to recruit you. 

In all of these introductions, not once were you able to get a word out. Even if you had tried, you were interrupted, far too polite to tell the other off for interjecting like that. Everyone noticed, however, your overwhelming silence, and mild awkwardness. You did a quick headcount of everyone, and noticed that there was someone missing. But that was around the time you felt it, like eyes were piercing through your armor and into your very soul. You were about to ask where the last person was before a siren blared overhead, declaring that the games were about to begin. You felt your heartbeat quicken, but kept your posture stiff, following where everyone else went. Along the bobbing heads of them all, you caught a sight of ghostly red, before it seemed to vanish in a burst of ash. That sensation of being watched never left.

  
  
  


The match had been one firefight after another, leaving you bruised and exhausted afterwards. You had been the only other squad left, your partners being Octane and Lifeline. You were about to pop your ability to overtake the last two, and you made the mistake of assuming their third was taken out already. Whispers of death and that mirage of ash was the first thing you saw, and you didn’t even have time to call out the fact that you were being flanked. You had spun on your heel, staring down the barrel of a gun pointed straight at your head. There was a stillness that hung in the air, and you caught a glance of the perpetrator. A lithe figure in red, white in the shape of a skull for a face as contrast. Burning yellow optics stared at you, and the next thing you knew you were out of the game.

Lifeline, upon patching you up on the fly back to base, explained that that had been Revenant. “He’s a ghost, al’ight. Comes at ‘ya when you least expect it. Nobody here can get real close to him, either. He actin’ like a caged animal most of the time. Be careful, ‘yah? Don’t get on his bad side.”

“He has a good side?” Octane asked beside you, sounding as if the very concept was the most alien thing imaginable. 

“If he does, try bein’ on it.”

That had been all the warning you got. When you finally landed, you could feel optics being burned into the back of your helmet. It made all the hair on your neck and arms raise in alarm, but you ignored it. You went straight to your chambers, tossing off all your armor before taking a cold, _cold_ shower. You only left your room to fetch dinner, the hood of your pullover pushed so far forward it hid most of your face. You waved to any who said hello, and politely shook your head when asked if you wanted to join them.

When the door closed behind you, everybody who sat in their respective circles looked to Bangalore, who was about to take a bite of some teriyaki. “What?” She huffed, lowering her fork and looking at them all.

“You said you knew of them,” Bloodhound prodded, their crow, Arthur, sat on their shoulder. “What they did. Who are they? Are they mute?”

Wattson clapped her hands together excitedly. “Oui! I am simply _dying_ to know more about them! They are simply shrouded in a mysterious darkness not even _I_ can illuminate!” She giggled a bit, the others either joining her or rolling their eyes. Bangalore let out a sigh, leaning back in her seat as she clasped her hands together.

“They speak, they just like bein’ real quiet, is all. One of the best people to have on your team if everyone’s shit outta luck, too. It’s like they _radiate_ good luck, hope, _however_ you want to put it. They just pull everyone back up on their feet. It’s like they always know what to do, too.”

She was about to say more before a manilla envelope was tossed onto the table, Crypto stuffing his hands back into his pockets. The others looked to him as he scoffed and looked away. “I found information on them,” he said. Not even he was exempt from the overwhelming curiosity that surrounded who you were. “In the military for a few years, was always offered promotions but never accepted. They were always at the frontlines, never working behind the scenes.”

Everyone stared at the envelope, before hands all around dove in to snag it, to read it first. None were quite as quick, though, as Pathfinder had been.

He flicked it open, single optic scanning over everything that had been found on you. The others looked to him, waiting for him to share what he’d found, or at least pass it on so someone else could. He read all of it pretty quickly, before closing it, handing it back to Crypto. His demeanor had changed significantly, all of a sudden. Wattson spoke up first.

“What did it say, my friend?”

The robot looked to her for a moment, before shaking his head.

“They should not be alive, that much is for sure. They have an admirable will to live, despite efforts of...” He hesitated a moment. “Despite everything they have been through. They have quite the history, but I think it is **very** rude for you all to be so intrusive on it!”

Octane spat out a harsh laugh. “Oh yeah? You just read all the deets on ‘em, robot! Isn’t that, you know, _pretty invasive?_ Hypocrite!” He went on a tangent before Bangalore shushed him, nodding her head in agreement.

“He’s right, though. It’s not any of our business. If they wanna share, they can. If not? Just another mystery to add to our growing list, right? We’ve all got our secrets. I think the new kid deserves to have their own, too.”

Many were not satisfied with that answer, but for the time being, would let it rest. You had heard some of the conversation through the door, frowning as you stared at your hands. Scars covered them, ranging from deep gashes to burns. So much history, etched into your flesh, so many stories that you were fine with keeping under lock and key.


	2. THE CLOCKWISE WITNESS.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "n Jewish mythology, a dybbuk (Yiddish: דיבוק, from the Hebrew verb דָּבַק dāḇaq meaning "adhere" or "cling") is a malicious possessing spirit believed to be the dislocated soul of a dead person. It supposedly leaves the host body once it has accomplished its goal, sometimes after being helped."

The following week you were allowed more days off from participating in the games. Ajay had explained it was for mental health, saying that the adjustment period varied from person to person. Some didn’t need to adjust, others took their sweet time…  _ Every person was unique _ , she offhandedly said.  _ You’re the same. _

So, you took that time to make adjustments to your gear, upgrades, buffing out dents and scratches, the whole nine yards. You kept track of the games that went on while you were out, your focus primarily on the elusive Revenant. You kept thinking back to the ash you saw on your first day, to him so easily sneaking up on you from behind that same day during the match. What little information you had told you enough; he was an assassin, so he was practically created for stealth. Almost a full contrary to you, though you could be sneaky if the situation called for it. Otherwise? You had no problem being out in the open. You were versed for that kind of thing, anyway.

You noted, however, that after your first match, your troubles of insomnia had come back. It was minimal at first, just taking a while to fall asleep, before it started to flourish into absolute hell. You were tempted to talk to Ajay about it, but she was a busy person. You opted to keep to yourself instead.

Big mistake.

A week in, your motor functions were hazy. Even Nox had made a mild comment on your inability to properly aim, when he and Pathfinder had been on your team your second ever match. The Doctor would’ve shown concern if your squad wasn’t under fire, but that didn’t stop the grappling bot from doing it for the both of them.

You rushed from one cover to another, coming to a sliding halt beside Path, dropping some shield cells for him to use. He accepted, gave thanks, then jumped straight to your problem.

“Your hands are shaking, friend! Has your adrenaline begun to wear off, or are you facing different issues?”

He was polite, you thought, but  _ way  _ too blunt. You wondered if it was out of actual care, or secret contempt. 

“I’m fine,” you fibbed, peeking to fire off some shots and dishing out some damage to the enemy’s shields.

“You are a horrible liar,” he said back, his single optic staring into the blank visor of your helmet as you looked back. His tone was hard to decipher.

You didn’t have time to react, a grenade falling between the two of you. You spared a glance to it, then back to him, before shoving him away with all your strength, sending the bot spiraling back and away. 

_ BOOM. _

You recall falling, your brain being rattled and your ears full of an annoying buzz that doesn’t seem to fade. Your vision was white, and you couldn’t quite hear anything. Maybe a robotic ‘oh dear!’ was somewhere in there, but otherwise you could only fall into an odd, white state of unconsciousness. 

You were being dragged away when you did come to, that much you were sure. There were shards of glass jabbing into your face, and you realised that your visor shattered and narrowly missed making you blind. You felt the warm liquid of blood on your forehead, left eyebrow, and across your nose, as well as your cheeks. The pain wasn’t registoring yet, but you  _ did  _ feel someone prying your chest piece off and tossing it to the side, before something being jabbed into your heart.

You felt a rush of sensations just then, before being brought to your knees, then feet. Nox had tossed some of his gas traps out to cause a distraction for your squad’s escape, and Path had pulled you out of the danger. Both seemed distressed, Path more so than the other.

“Carefully now, friend! Don’t rush it, you took an awful amount of damage just now!” His cheery voice was grating on your nerves, but you said nothing. When you were finally standing, you unclicked your helmet, pieces of glass falling out as it split in two, both halves falling at your feet and heels. The other two looked at you for a moment, seemingly taken aback by seeing your face and your frazzled, uncontrolled hair, but you ignored that and administered a health syringe. 

You cast a tired glance toward your destroyed armor, shaking your head in disappointment. Nox handed you a Flatline, giving you a nod, before moving in the direction  _ away  _ from all the gunfire. You and Path followed silently, opting to find better loot and armor than risking getting eliminated. 

  
  


It was a solid 20 minutes of jogging, you lagging behind the most, but the three of you found an unlooted area and sat back to catch a moment of rest. Nox had tossed you a medkit, informing you to dress your wounds so as to not get blood in your eyes. Path even showed you into a building that had a bathroom with running water. It made you realise that they had been doing this for a far longer time, and knew the lands far better than any studying could accomplish for you. Things were quiet for now as you cleaned yourself up, sparing a glance into the mirror to grimace at the state of you. You were likely going to have some scarring, but that wasn’t new. You just wish it hadn’t been your face.

You cleaned up, doing a kind of shitty job at bandaging, but it would do until you could see a proper medical professional. You went down the stairs to join the others, squatting down beside them and watched them scan the area carefully. Bringing up the map, you saw that only three squads remained. Suddenly, it went down to two. That made you realise that you had heard gunshots off in the distance, but not as far as you would have appreciated.

“Prepare yourselves,” Nox said, checking his weapons to make sure they were all properly reloaded and in working condition. “We will not be alone for long.”

Hunkering down with the Doctor’s gas traps had been a risky idea, but you suggested an easy out; Pathfinder could shoot his grappling off into the outer rings of the circle, and cause an out toward the other buildings in the current area. There was a tiny spot inside that was just barely touched by the ring, meaning a temporary safe haven to gather wits, health, and shields. It was just as risky to fly out in the open like that, but being cornered was less desirable than the alternative. 

So, the traps were set, and you all waited. It did not take long for the remaining squad to show up, but as of right now, the three of you had the high ground. You checked your weapons quietly, making sure they didn’t click too loudly, before you pulled out a device that had been sitting in one of your waist pouches. The other two spared you a glance, but you just gave them a reassuring nod, to which they returned.

“ _ Path, _ ” you whispered, “ _ throw a thermite in the direction opposite of us. Try to make it seem like it came from the other building. _ ” 

The bot hesitated, before doing just that, his movements careful and calculated. Twisting and popping, he threw the grenade, it landing with a soft  _ thump  _ before going off. You looked down your sights, seeing movement to go and investigate. Just as you had planned.

“There seems to only be two,” Nox pointed out, which caused you to frown. Instinctively, you looked behind you, but only saw a blank wall. You felt watched all of a sudden, and it made all the hairs on the back of your neck stand at once. You hit the button on the little device, and a soft  _ ping  _ rang out.

Finally, you spoke, standing up and making the move forward. The other two were confused, but followed your lead, albeit hesitantly. “Caustic, are your traps still up?”

“Yes,” he said. “What did you do?”

As you predicted, bullets came raining down upon the three of you, and you immediately dove outside of the building for cover, the others following suit. You shot off in their direction, taking damage, but you didn’t bat an eye. You ordered the others to fire off, send grenades, however they should please. Nox was about to object, but Pathfinder did not hesitate, firing off several rounds and taking hefty damage. “Do not question them, they know exactly what they are doing.”

Nox thought about it for a second, before doing the same as you and Path. His damage wasn’t as bad, but it was enough. 

“I’m doing what I do best,” you told Nox, giving him a small smile. You twisted your body, barrel facing a ghostly familiar figure wrapped in burning ember and ash. You fired off a few rounds, making him vanish before he could do what he had done to you before. 

You threw the device to the ground, it exploding with a  _ pop _ as, suddenly, the three of you had most of your health and shields back. You leapt from your cover, laying down fire upon the enemy. You saw Gibralter, Lifeline, and Revenant. Path and Nox followed your lead, doing the same.

You unleashed your tactical ability, and everybody within the radius had their guns automatically reloaded from reserves. It meant more bullet showers for both sides, but you weren’t too worried about that.

Damage was done equally, but you had the upperhand; you still had some shields left, and only a few seconds left to spare on your main ability. You saw Lifeline go down, Gibraltar's shield collapse, and Revenant must be trying to sneak around again. One out, two left.

“Gas trap!” You called out, and Nox did as instructed, wasting no time on clinging the collapsed saucer out in their directions. The fumes burst forth, consuming the enemies. You heard a ping, confirming that Lifeline was out for good, and the noise of Gibraltar falling to the gas soon followed. He wouldn’t be an issue anymore. 

You turned around, about to warn Path and Nox of the remaining threat, but they had already been taken out. You were too focused on eliminating that you hadn’t noticed. Both were down, too seperated for you to safely get to either. You were out in the open, out in danger.

_ Just how you liked it. _

  
  


“Come out, let’s have a proper firefight! No hiding,  _ *Dybbuk _ !” You called out, looking to the empty space that stood before you.

The sensation of being watched stood behind you, and you whipped around, dodging digits formed into a sharp weapon aimed straight for your vulnerable and exposed chest. Revenant made another swipe, but you were quicker, ducking down and kicking his legs at the joints. It would be impossible to sweep him off his feet like you could do to a normal human, but he was made of steel and wires and want for blood, which meant he weighed a  _ ton. _

The incursion made his legs buckle in the opposite direction, causing him to collapse. You stood over him, barrel aimed at his head. Burning yellow eyes slid from the tip of your gun, past your hand, up your arm, and finally settled on your face. You weren’t sure, but if he were capable of facial expressions, he might just be frowning at you.

“Until Heaven and Earth pass away, not an  _ iota _ , not a  _ dot _ , will pass from the law until  **all** is accomplished."

You fired.

  
  
  


Winning your first match had been a thrill, and you really couldn’t stop grinning. Nox and Pathfinder had congratulated you on it, one reluctantly thanking you for leading them to victory, the other more than pleased to show his appreciation for another noteworthy game that will be talked about on forums. You were elated, of course, but would remain humble as well.

Everyone was picked up, medical needs distributed as necessary. For the most part, everybody was in fine condition, but you were severely feeling the after effects of having a grenade blow up, quite literally, in your face.

“‘Ya got careless there, hmm?” Ajay said, cleaning your cuts before bandaging them up better than you had. “Went and got your gear destroyed, too. That happen a lot?”

“Depends on the situation,” you replied quietly. She clicked her tongue, before pulling away, checking the rest of you for any place glass could have gotten. “My armor is easily replaceable. My life isn’t.”

“ ‘Mind me to have you wit’ us as a team sometime. ‘Ya didn’t peg me as a support type, yet ‘ya blew that last match clean out of the water. Good on you, Iota.”

Makoa laughed jovially from across you two, slapping his knee in the process. “You were amazing out there! You got grit, alright!” You flushed at the compliments, waving them off some. 

“I was just trying to win, the same as everybody else here.”

Makoa and Ajay were about to object to your dismissal, but were stopped when the mood seemed to drop. Revenant was approaching, which made the medic shrink back just a bit. You held yourself, however, not wavering under the simulacrum’s suffocating aura.

“Don’t think this makes us equals,” he grunted out. “One win doesn’t make you the sovereignty here.”

“I wouldn’t dream it.”

He cast you a scrutinizing glance before huffing, moving on to go terrorize someone else or sulk over his loss. Ajay and Makoa gave you a look, before commenting on how Revenant was grumpier than usual.

“You might have gotten yourself a rival,” Makoa said, crossing his arms. “‘Yuh, not a great one, though a shame.” The two carried on to a different topic, and left you to your thoughts. A rival? Did Revenant see you as that much of a threat? Perhaps that was why he had sought you out that first match, to get a read on you and try to make you flimsily throw out your abilities. He thought you were careless, when at the time you were only caught off guard.

Leaning back and closing your eyes for the last of the flight back to base, you considered your options. Corner him and tell him to piss off…

Or challenge him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Needed to change reader's Legend name, as I couldn't think up an ability to fix 'Epsilon'. It's been changed to 'Iota', with a capital i. More to explain as the story goes on!


	3. DEATH BY BLONDE.

You bolted upright from your bed, the darkness in your room seemingly swirling around you, making you want to panic. Calming your uneasy breathing, with a hand over your heart to feel its rapid beat, you started at the shadowy figure who stood in the corner. It was definitely  _ not  _ a sleep paralysis demon, as that would entail you, well, being  _ paralysed.  _ You kicked your blanket off, standing, gathering your balance.

And then you walked toward it.

Obviously, with his burning yellow eyes, you knew it was Revenant. How he had gotten into your locked room was beyond you, but he was here, creeping around like a cat stalking the night. You weren’t going to be scared, or even intimidated by him, because while his whole 7’0” frame  _ could  _ pose a threat, you knew he wasn’t going to act on it outside of the ring. The whole month of being here and you had already gotten a pretty decent beat on him. This he knew.

“Dybbuk,” you said, voice hoarse from being dry. “What do you want? What time is it?”

There was an air of hesitation before the simulacrum grunted at you, shifting his posture to lean against the corner wall with arms crossed. You could only barely see his outline in the shadows, but his eyes gave him away. He turned his head a bit, staring away from you as you stood before him.

“You were making too much noise in your sleep, skinbag.”

You were thankful for the dark in this instance, because you felt yourself go flush, your hand reaching up to touch your forehead. You felt uncomfortably warm, and for a second you wondered if you were getting sick again. 

“It was just nightmares.”

_ Grunt. _

“Sorry if I woke you, though. You could’ve, uh, knocked, though, to wake me up. Not sneak into my room and creep around like a dybbuk.”

He pushed himself off the wall, shoving past you. You got tipsy for a second, but reached out toward the nearest wall to stabilize your balance as you glared at him. You heard his heavy footfalls, the soft shifting of metal. Something about it was… Calming, in a weird sort of way.

“I don’t sleep, you were just being annoying. Be quieter, or you’ll wake up with your heart in my hands.”

With that, he stalked off, almost slamming your door shut behind him. You were once again left alone in your dark room, so you spared a glance toward the clock that sat beside your bed and saw that it read  _ 4:26 A.M. _

Yeah, you weren’t going to be able to go back to sleep.

  
  
  


The match the following day had caused you such severe dizziness, even Nox stopped the firefight to see if you were okay. And he was on an opposing squad. Ajay had pulled you aside, thumping you upside the head with a karate-chop before grilling you on whether you were taking care of yourself or not. You gave half-assed replies, and it just made her frown. 

“You ain’t gonna like me for this, but you gotta understand where it’s comin’ from, sugar.”

She shoved you into a gas trap, and you went down. As you had your coughing fit, you could only look up at her, morbidly confused, as she basically was the cause for you being taken out of the match so early on. It was going to be a big discussion point on forums, you thought absently, as darkness clouded your vision. 

You woke up, who knows however much later, in the medical wing. A blonde with pretty blue eyes was looking you over, mumbling something in German before consulting her notes once again. You blinked at her, positive she looked familiar, but couldn’t quite place it. She broke the silence once she saw you were finally awake.

“Sleep deprivation,” she said pointedly. “Have you been having troubles recently, or has this always been the case? The Apex games are incredibly taxing on the human body, and if you fail to take proper care of yourself, you’ll… Well, you know what will happen. You certainly will not be around long enough to see another paycheck.”

You hesitated, considering lying, but from her nametag that read  _ Dr. Ziegler, _ you knew it’d just get you another karate-chop. “Yeah,” you said quietly, hands tangled together and resting at your lap. “It’s been an on again off again thing ever since my time in the military. I’ve tried sleep aids, but they don’t work on me. Enhanced metabolism makes them go really quickly. The best thing I can do is just wear it through and wait ‘til it ends again.”

Her icy blue eyes stared at you before she looked away reluctantly, writing down some more stuff on her clipboard. She chewed on her bottom lip, a variety of emotions crossing her face. Finally, she sighed, setting the clipboard down before putting her hands on her hips.

“I do not typically recommend this to any patient, because it could lead to some very serious issues, but I wish to test it with you. I want you, instead of trying to go to sleep at your usual time, to stay awake for as long as you possibly can.”

You opened your mouth to speak, but she beat you to it, raising her hand to silence you.

“Perhaps you have tried it already in the past, but since your circumstances and situation are very different compared to that time, I want you to try it again. Occupy your mind with something. Eventually the exhaustion will hit you all at once, and you will find yourself in a deep sleep. Again, I would never typically recommend this to a patient, but you are a very special case. Your file is very thorough, despite the black lines.”

You swallowed thickly, nodding your head. She asked if you understood or had any questions, to which you replied that you got it, nothing else beyond that. With that all said, she discharged you, telling you to take it easy and to miss the next couple of matches. Or at least until this sorts itself out.

Pulling your baggy pullover on and tugging the hood over, you stuffed your hands in it’s pocket and made your way toward the commons area. The match was still in progress, so you settled in on one of the corner couches to watch it. Your squad, Ajay and Tae Joon, were currently placed in third right now.

The other squads consisted of Gibraltar / Revenant / Octane, Bloodhound / Mirage / Caustic, and yours. Things were incredibly tense, the drones that broadcasted everything showing split screens of everyone and how they were faring. Pulling your knees up to your chest and wrapping your arms around your legs, you leaned toward the screen, watching the two with anxious anticipation.  _ Worrying. _

Makoa and his two managed to take out  Bloth  and their’s, leaving only two squads left. Three against two, which didn’t seem fair to people who were just tuning in, but you knew Ajay. If someone plopped a Peacekeeper into her hands, she knew how to clear a room out.

And, thankfully, she had just that.

Tae Joon had sent his drone out, near immediately finding the other squad. The Ring was tiny, growing smaller by the minute, and with a sleepy glance toward the timer, you noted that the two were safely inside the zone, the others just coming to the outer edge of it. A firefight was just about to start, and once Tae Joon had recalled his drone, he pulled out his Kraber and risked a peek through the window of the building they were occupying.

It proved fruitful as he took a shot, striking Revenant and taking a good chunk of his armor out. You watched as it all unfolded, covers being taken from both sides, and you leaned back, yawning. Blearily, you tried blinking away the dark that sat at the corner of your vision, and as more gunfire rang out from the screen, you drifted into a deep sleep.

  
  


It wasn’t the sensation of cold metal clawing across your throat that woke you, but that returning feeling of being watched that did it. You jostled, sitting upright from your spot on the couch, and looked around the completely pitch black commons room. It took a moment, but you finally remembered that you’d fallen asleep on the couch. Well… Passed out, more like, but regardless. Rubbing your eyes with the sleeves of your hoodie, you looked around the room, before turning your head to peer over your shoulder, gaze meeting glowing amber optics that cut through the darkness quite softly.

You blinked at Revenant, before jolting back, getting tangled in the blanket you were sure you hadn’t fallen asleep with. With limbs restricted, you tried to move, only succeeding in falling off the couch and hitting the floor face-first. A  _ thud  _ sounded out, followed up by sarcastic laughter. He was  _ laughing  _ at you.

Wiggling free, you stood, ignoring the ache on the side of your face from colliding with the floor, and tossed the blanket over his head, watching as his glowing eyes were shrouded in fabric. Now it was  _ his  _ turn to struggle, and yours to chuckle as you left to go to a real bed.

The following morning, there was a distraught Nataile and a ripped up blanket across the couch and floor. When she, somewhat misty-eyed, asked you what had happened, you said Revenant had done it while you were asleep.

It wasn’t  _ entirely  _ a lie, but watching the small blonde stomp off in the direction of the simulacrum, as well as hearing angry French from the other room, made it pretty worth it. If he was going to sneak up on you while you slept and be a weirdo, you were going to get back at him for it every time.

“Did he really do that?” Makoa asked, picking up a bit of the shredded fabric, looking it over carefully. 

“Yes,” you replied, taking a sip of your water. “He’s the only one here who really…  _ Shreds  _ things, anyway. It’s like dealing with a cat who keeps clawing up the furniture.”

The man laughed at that, shaking his head. “You just don’t seem scared of him, huh? I don’t get how you do it. I mean, I could  _ easily  _ take the tincan on, but he still gives me the heebie jeebies, you know? What’s got ‘ya so turned off to that, anyway?”

Giving a nonchalant shrug, you turned to face him more fully. “Takes a lot to scare me, I guess. He’s creepy, sure, but… It’s just like being in the same space as a really intimidating raccoon. You never know what it’s gonna do, but for now, you know it’s going to be idle.”

Makoa gave you a bit of a funny look before chuckling, setting to picking up the bits. You took another swig of water before setting the bottle aside, helping him clean it all up. You wouldn’t admit it to being partially your fault; at least, not yet. You’d make it up to Nataile first, maybe buy her a new blanket before saying you’d had a hand in the first one’s destruction.

As you were thinking this, you had the absolute pleasure of watching Revenant walk into the commons, being followed by a very mad French woman who was hitting him wherever she could reach with a rolled up newspaper, and, truly, you tried to not laugh, but you couldn’t help yourself. You regretted it immediately of course, as the glare sent your way by Revenant could probably kill you if it held any more venom.

“I’ll get you a new one, Nat, don’t worry about it.”

“Gah! Dommage! That one was my favorite, and this… This  _ fantomatique  _ had to do this!” That earned him another whap, and you puffed your cheeks with air, trying not to grin. Revenant grunted, before burning into amber and ash, vanishing from the room. Likely off to find a corner to skulk in, you thought.

“It’s okay,” you said quietly. “I know where to get one exactly like this. Oh! By the way, who won the match yesterday? I fell asleep as the last two squads were dueling it out.”

Nataile was about to open her mouth, weaponized newspaper finally settling at her side, as Ajay rolled in, cracking her knuckles with loud and satisfying pops. “We did,” the medic spoke first, shooting you a grin. “Plenty luck thanks to a helpful little drone. You sleep well, though?”

You gave a nod, offering a small smile as Ajay joined you all. Makoa had picked up as many pieces as he could, taking the ones you’d gathered and leaving to toss them. Nataile heaved out a sad sigh, trailing behind the man to reminisce about the memories she held with that poor blanket. Now it was just you and Ajay.

“You got colour back in your face, good to see. Keep this strat up, keep me and Zielger updated, too. ‘Ya don’t need to go getting sick from no sleep, either.” She waggled a finger at you, giving you a little bit more of a scolding before heading off to get some breakfast.

You were alone again, and turned your head toward a particularly dark corner of the room, catching glowing eyes just as they vanished.

You were getting wiser to his tricks, alright.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little easter egg of Mercy (from Overwatch!), even if that and Apex have no connection. I just thought it'd be fun, but also I didn't want to make up a whole character to have appear only once or twice.


	4. VENGO! VENGO!

Data pad in one hand, toothbrush in the other, you read up on news articles and forum posts about the previous match. There was a lot of speculation on why Lifeline had basically kicked you out so early on, some saying foul names while others gave genuine thoughts on the matter. You didn’t care either way, having spoken to Ajay about her opinion on what they had to say about the whole ordeal. She gave a shrug, smirking. 

“I don’t let it bother me,” she had told you, tending to her hair. “Plenty a’ folks will say what they want, but I can’t bring myself to care ‘bout what they have to say. You shouldn’t, either.”

That was an adequate reply, you thought. You scrolled past those forum posts, finding others on people just praising or critiquing other Legends. You saw a few talking about you, but before tapping on them to read anything, stopped yourself.

Elliott had warned you against that, saying that there would be some  _ really  _ hurtful things others will say. Due to the anonymous cover of forums, and a general online presence to begin with, people tended to just say whatever they wanted, be it mean or nice. You kept scrolling.

A chill draft came past your elbow, and you looked up to your bathroom mirror, seeing ash and amber as a certain bastard materialized behind you to cause grievance. Like usual. 

Toothbrush hanging from the corner of your mouth, you frowned. 

“What.”

You were met with a grunt, the simulacrum leaning over you to knock something off your sink counter. He was just like an irritable, hateful cat. You were tempted to spit at him, but thought better of it. You were, you  _ think,  _ somewhere on his good side. Maybe a little toe over the line, but still there regardless.

“Why do you lock your door?” He asked, picking up a q-tip to try to shove in your ear.

“To try to keep goons who don’t know what personal space or boundaries are,  _ out _ . It isn’t working so far, though. How the hell do you keep letting yourself in?”

You swatted the q-tip out of his hand, before trying to go back to brushing your teeth. You set your data pad down, to which he immediately picked it up, scrolling through what you were just doing. Didn’t he have something better to do?

“The vents,” he said ominously. You scrunched your nose at him.

Spitting out the toothpaste and washing the brush, you then splashed some cold water on your face. You felt around for a towel, only to brush against cold digits that were handing you said towel. Well, maybe he wasn’t  _ that  _ bad.

“I picked that one up off the floor.”

OK.

_ You take back the previous statement. _

You opened your eyes and chucked the dirty towel at him, grabbing the actual clean one and drying your face off. As you pulled it away, you were met with glowing optics, staring you down with a burning intensity. He looked like he wanted to ask a question, but was unsure on how to phrase it exactly.

“Do you do this to everybody?”

He didn’t answer, setting your data pad down and reaching up, moving some hair out of your face. It would’ve been sweet, had he not bunched it all up and  _ yanked,  _ causing you to fall back with his motion. He only released once he was sure you’d fall on your ass.

“Just the people I’m tenderizing to kill,” his laughter faded as he burned into amber again, leaving you on the floor, sprawled, and a little bit pissed off. You laid in that spot for a few, fuming quietly. You weren’t, however, going to let his antics get to you too much. You were going to have to talk to someone about this, though, and thankfully, you knew just the bot.

  
  


Pathfinder had been off and away, mostly avoiding the others and meandering around in silence and general aloneness. It was a bit unusual, you thought, as you finally stumbled upon him. He hadn’t taken notice of your presence yet, so you took the time to watch him appreciate his silence. For a chatty, happy bot, he sure seemed to like being alone.

“I know you’re there!” He finally broke the quiet, head turning so he could focus his optic on you. “You can come join me, I don’t mind!” He even patted the spot on the floor beside him, tilting his head just a bit. You figured, if he could smile, he’d be doing so right now.

You approached, plopping to the ground and sitting criss-cross. He watched your legs for a moment, before going to copy you, acting like he had never thought of sitting in such a way before. It was cute, actually.

“Is there something that you needed, friend? Nobody really comes to look for me unless they need a zipline!”

The way he phrased that made your chest ache a bit, but you held back a frown. “Yeah, actually. You’re smart, I was wondering if you, uh… Knew anything, about Revenant. He’s being weird lately.”

“He’s not causing problems, is he? I know he can be mean, but I don’t think he really means what he says! He’s just… Grumpy!”

“He’s causing problems.”

“Oh.”

There’s a moment of silence, and you turned your head to look at Pathfinder, already seeing his optic staring at you. With pursed lips, you continued.

“He’s been… I don’t know how to put it, but he’s been very talkative with me. He keeps seeking me out and pestering me whenever he can. He also keeps breaking into my room. Has he done this with you? Or anybody else, for that matter?”

The bot let out a thoughtful hum, optic boring a hole into your skull. He was sweet, and while you tended to like his cheery disposition, sometimes he would appear offputting, or just threatening. It was kind of impressive, in a way.

“He’s only ever threatened me,” he finally spoke, gaze shifting away to stare off into space. “He likes to haunt the others sometimes if they’ve beaten him in a match, but that never lasts long. It’s an intimidation tactic, I think. He likes to try to assert his dominance and assure himself that he’s still as scary as his victims think he is.

“But you’re not a victim, are you? Not to anybody like him.” Path held a hand up, toward you, palm up. You weren’t sure what he wanted, but you placed your hand in his, and he held it. It held soft intentions, and made you pause.

“You’re a very strong person! Whatever life throws at you, you’ll never let anything, or anybody, hold you back! That’s why you were at the frontlines. That’s why you’re related to  _ him. _ ”

He took his other hand and pulled your long glove off from your right, revealing the tattoo you kept hidden there as much as possible. Padded digits ran across your skin, and you let him. The star map to a home you don’t remember much of, but heard so many stories of…

“You managed to read the redacted lines of my file, huh?” You asked quietly, staring down at the tattoo with some fondness. “Yes,” Path replied. He pulled your glove back on, giving it a pat, before releasing you. “Tae Joon managed to find them, he’s so clever! We’re the only two who read them. I think Anita knows a little bit, but she’s not as nosy. Very kind of her.”

“You’re not going to tell anybody, are you?” You pushed, the tiniest amount of caution trailing behind your words. You wanted to be safe, and survival was the best option. Especially in the Apex games.

“Of course not! You’re a friend, and as such, your secrets are safe with me! I trust Jae Joon to do the same, so you should, as well! We have discussed this some, and will keep our lips sealed. And I don’t even have lips!”

Finally releasing a breath you didn’t even realise you were holding, you relaxed, tugging at the glove Pathfinder had messed with. It was a snippet of personal information you wanted to keep under wraps, and you were determined to keep it as such.

Finally, you stood, stretching your legs, before offering Path a hand to help him up as well. He accepted, though you were sure he weighed a fair bit more than you, so he made it like you were actually helping him.

“As for your troubles with Revenant, maybe he’s warmed up to you and sees you as an ally rather than a target to be eliminated! He has not behaved in such a way toward anybody else, so you are actually quite lucky for him to be so friendly with you! I’m almost jealous!”

Friendly? Was that his own way of showing it? Being an annoying house cat, knocking some of your shit down to get your attention and--- oh.

He’s been trying to get your attention.

“Thanks, Pathy,” you said, leaning up to give him a kiss near his optic, presumably where a cheek would be. “Let’s hang out sometime like this again. I like the peace and quiet, you’re good company.”

His optic glowed a bit brighter at that, and he waved you off, both of you saying your farewells to each other.

You had a lot to think about.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I LIVE.... MOSTLY.
> 
> Friendship developments in this chapter! 
> 
> Thoughts, suggestions, etc, are appreciated!


	5. THE ENEMY GUNS.

Loba.   
  


When everyone had gotten news of a new Legend joining the roster, you were excited. The others seemed just as much, so many new faces coming along to play in the Games. That was announced two months ago, and just this week, the mysterious beauty that was named Loba had made a grand entrance, effectively interrupting a match already in progress. You were going to miss Skull Town, for sure.

You were no expert, though, but the hatred that she had toward Revenant was an incredibly loud anomaly. It went beyond any physical understanding, something that boiled never-endingly, deep down in the far reaches of her soul. She was flirty, and witty, and hid her pain well, but the comments and scornful looks she gave to the Simulacrum made her opinions on him quite known.

It became all the more obvious when you and several others were invited into a secret meeting at Elliott’s bar. You were enough of a background presence that posed no real threat that she felt you were perfectly capable of helping her stab Revenant in the back, and put an end to his reign.

This was also the place where you learned just  _ why  _ she hated him so viciously.

And, truly, you could not blame her.

Having your parents slaughtered right in front of you as a terrifying, metal machine built strictly for murder would forever haunt a person. It depended, though, on the type of person one would have to be in order to face these circumstances. Grief made eternal, but an otherwise indifferent life lived, or…. Revenge. 

You knew a thing or two about both.

The moment the secret meeting had started, you simply sat quietly, looking intent on what was happening. Absolutely nobody was the wiser to the device you had stuffed away in your shirt, keeping tabs on everything that was said. You’d add your own clever dialogue to it after the fact, and send it to the one who needed it most.

You would never condone murder, not in a million years, but in a peculiar turn of events… You had reached an understanding with Revenant. You knew, in a small way, just what was up with him. He sometimes mumbled, likely something from long ago, a habit that became the norm and went unnoticed by his own processes. You had a basic understanding of Simulacrums, as well, so you pieced enough of the puzzle together to realise just what this ruthless murder machine had been through. It wasn’t on a personal level, because you know he’d never spill those beans with you, or whatever it is he may know or remember from his past, but you had an idea. And that was enough. 

The glances you caught from the corner of your eye from a friend close by didn’t go unnoticed, though. You may have only been around a little under a year now, the ever constant harassment from the ghost that liked watching you sleep (or, try to), you had built some solid friendships. And you were very thankful for them.

Makoa was sneaky, for a man of his stature, and you being the only person to see his quick glances was a success. Bloth, who sat beside him, was given a gentle nudge, just enough to get their attention. Pathfinder was behind the two.

You knew what it was the three were thinking. 

After the meeting, everyone split, going in their own respective directions, either hanging around a while longer to get a drink from Elliott, or just outright leave. You sought out a corner outside, loitering about and kicking some trash that had been dropped. After about 30 minutes of this, a tall shadow cast over you from behind, and you turned around only to see Loba herself.

Shit.

“Hello, beautiful,” she said, a nailed finger reaching out to boop your nose. You smiled a bit, leaning back to try to get away from it playfully. “What could possibly have you standing out here in this dark, scary area so late at night?”

“I’m waiting on Bloth,” you said, hands tucked cozily into your pockets to keep them warm, and out of sight. “They wanted to get some late-night food at a diner nearby before we head back home together. I think Makoa was going to join us, too.” You paused, offering a sweet smile. “Did you want to tag along? This place’s burgers are really good.”

Loba made a face of mild disgust, the expression not fitting such pretty features, but it quickly went soft as she gave your cheek a quick pat. “No, but thanks anyway, darling. Burgers were never quite my thing. So sweet, aren’t you?”

You thought she was moving to the side of you to leave, but she decided to circle you, instead. Like a wolf sizing up it’s prey, before pouncing. “You were very quiet tonight. Have a lot on your mind? You can tell me, you know. We’ve not known each other long, but we’re friends, aren’t we?” Her tone of voice was so delicate, it was on the verge of spilling over into contemptment. Almost.

“Not at all,” you spoke evenly, giving a shrug. “I was just listening, and forming a plan alongside yours, is all.”

“Oh?”

“That bastard  _ robot  _ has been harassing me since I joined, always out to get me. He’s the absolute worst, and I truly hate him with every fiber of my being. I can relate to you on some level. We may not be on the same page, but we’re definitely in the same book. I want him gone.”

The wicked smile that graced her freckle spotted face was chilling, but it softened as she leaned in, and you felt how warm her breath was on your face. Her eyes were blazing with a rage you’d never seen before.  _ Not in a human, that is. _

“I am beyond delighted to have you with me, Iota. I know your history, your family… A criminal for a father, I can’t imagine…” She reached down, taking your wrist and pulling the sleeve up, revealing that tattoo. “It must be difficult to hide that big secret. Being related to him, that is… A colossal burden to bear. How did you sneak in under Hammond’s nose like that, I wonder?”

You couldn’t help the smile, your cheeks suddenly feeling a little flushed. “A name change can do wonders sometimes. Different coloured hair, associating with another half of the family…. And, Jack Cooper was  _ not  _ a criminal. He was just…”

“Misunderstood? Oh, love, I know. But don’t worry… With your assistance in this, I can wipe those records clean. You’ll never have to go a day with looking over your shoulder in paranoia again. A paradise sits ahead, it just,” she let go of you, pulling the sleeve down gently, “needs full cooperation. I’m sure you understand. I liked this little talk of ours, lovely. Let’s do it again sometime, yes?”

With that, she disappeared into the shadows, the click-clacking of her heels hitting the concrete before fading into the distance. Once she was gone for good, Makoa and Bloth rounded the corner, posture a bit stiff. They heard everything, and you wondered if Loba knew that. She probably did. 

The trip to the diner was quiet, and along the way, Pathfinder had joined your little group. He didn’t need to eat, but sometimes he just liked feeling included. The moment you all had sat down in a quiet corner, was when the first question was popped. And it was the most pressing one, too, which you expected.

“ _ The  _ Jack Cooper? You’re related to him?” Makoa’s voice was hushed, but still surprised, and perhaps a little offput. You nodded, taking a long sip of your cold water. He and Bloth exchanged looks, and Pathfinder piped up.

“I knew all along! Iota confided in me, but swore me to secrecy. I assume that you two will do the same, for their sake! And your own!” 

You smiled at the MRVN, giving him a little elbow nudge. “We can’t force them to, Path. I won’t be happy if they  _ do  _ snitch, but I can’t make them do anything. And neither can you.” He gave a solemn nod, hands clasped and resting on the table in front of him. Bloth crossed their arms, obviously thinking about this very deeply, but before they could say anything, Makoa beat them to it.

“Your secret’s safe with us, hoaloha. Promise on our lives. But that’s not the  _ real  _ subject at hand, is it?”

Bloth finally broke their silence, sitting up a little bit straighter. “You know that the newest addition to our roster has… Shaky intentions, at best. She is out to gain only for herself, and is dragging all of us in with promises none of us can be sure she will keep. But, the object of her ire is even less of an ideal individual…. We are at a crossroads, are we not?”

You leaned back in your chair some, one leg coming up to rest on your other, arm pulled back to rest on the back of your chair. “Nobody here is innocent, of course. We’re acting as double agents, and if we get found out, who the hell knows what’ll happen. Loba was smart enough to hunt down that destroyed area where Revenant’s near-infinite bodies are manufactured, and she probably found  _ him, _ or what’s left of him. I don’t know everything about the guy, but… I know enough. He deserves to be punished for what he did, but at the same time, so does Hammond Robotics. They’re the root cause of all of this.”

Everybody looked at you quizzically. “What? I did my research. Crypto may have helped a little bit…. We can trust him, but we can’t tell him all of our intentions, either. In a way he’d understand, but… In instances like this? It’s every person for themselves.”

“I agree! I don’t even know if I can trust any of you! Ha ha, that was a joke.” Pathfinder’s little screen showed a laughing emote, which lightened  _ his  _ mood more than it did anybody else. Food was ordered shortly after, and everybody who could eat, ate in relative silence, other than any comment on the quality of the food being served. For late at night, it was fresh, and actually pretty damn good. You’ll remember this place, for sure.

After midnight dinner was had, Makoa insisted on paying, and soon you were all gathered outside once again, soon to depart back to base. Pathfinder had stopped everyone from going quite yet, insistent on having one last thing to say.

“If we are going to be helping Revenant… We can’t let him know it’s any of us. For obvious reasons! If he knows, Loba will, as well. Iota did well shaking her off at the bar, but that doesn’t mean she can’t be suspicious! Let’s all promise to have each other’s backs. We need to have cover stories, too, maybe! Wow, this is just like those television dramas, how cool is that?”

You and Makoa chuckled a bit, but ultimately you all agreed. The cover was that, as an act of a stronger bond and friendship, the four of you would go out and eat at whatever time allowed any of you to be together at once. If anybody questioned it, they’d be invited along. If they accepted, a hearty little meal would be had all together, no secrets being shared, no ideas being given. Just normal friends having midnight dinner sometimes. 

It was a shaky story, but it’d hold up if you all managed to keep appearances. That also meant friendlier exchanges whenever teamed up or just spending time together. You liked these three, and knew they enjoyed your company as well, so it wouldn’t be difficult. This was a team effort, and you all had to be in on it.

You, Bloth, Makoa and Path returned to the base sometime after 2 A.M., and upon your entry, you felt four pairs of burning into the back of your skull… Great. Now you were being stalked by  _ two  _ individuals. As if Revenant wasn’t enough.

You could tell this was going to be an interesting season.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! I've been very occupied lately with work, among other stressors. I hope everybody has been safe.
> 
> To elaborate on who Jack Cooper is, I'm just tying in lore from Titanfall 2, and I thought, what better way to do that than have Iota be related to him, in some way? If you've yet to play Titanfall 2, I highly recommend it. The tattoo is also the same that Jack has, I just thought it'd be fun for it to be a little family thing. It's origin is "a star map to home", a.k.a the planet called Harmony, that's in the game!

**Author's Note:**

> If there's a scenario you would like to see, just yell it at me!


End file.
